No Smoking In Kentucky

So, today our soon-to-be-sainted Governor announced that he’s signing an executive order banning smoking on all state property. This means, instead of designated smoking areas at state office buildings, there will be No Smoking, Period, Get Over It, Chew Some Gum.

So of course, the entire office, and actually, the entire multi-storied building, was all abuzz, and all the loud awful women who reek of cheap cigarettes were blowing off far too much steam far too loudly about “smokers rights” (you don’t have any when you’re polluting my air) and “who does he think he is” (he’s The Governor, bitch) and “I’ll just Quit” (and we know you really won’t but we really wish you would).

And then the news broke that Joan Rivers had passed.

It was sort of amazing. It spread like wildfire, from cubicle to cubicle. They went to their friends and said “did you hear about Joan Rivers?” And suddenly, that was what the entire building was talking about, instead of the pending smoking ban.

Joan Rivers was so funny and so talented and so good at what she did and so important as a trailblazing female comic, but you really don’t expect little hick women in Kentucky to care much about that or respect that or even know that. And they didn’t, really. All they know is that she was Funny and they Liked Her, which is, according to Melissa, all she ever wanted.

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