Fast Food Homophobia

So, I find the recent ads by a major fast food chain that will remain unnamed (but their initials begin with D and end with Q) to be a little disconcerting.  They find the perfect new spokesperson, a young male millennial with a trustworthy look and a nice voice, and after airing his commercials for a brief time, they’ve suddenly pulled the commercials featuring the lad in person talking about the joys of breakfast served at this fairly gross ice cream parlor, and all they’re running now are the commercials using his voice, and they’ve slowed down the voice-over tape just a tad to make the lads voice a touch deeper and more masculine.  And as a very old gay fart who has been subjected to just about every form of subtle and unprovable discrimination and homophobia there is, you just get that sick feeling in the pit of your stomach that the lad is reading a tad too gay on the air, but he’s under contract, so they can’t really fire him for that without a PR nightmare, especially if he’s not really gay but just films as vaguely maybe sort of gay.  But rather than risk the wrath of Homophobes United, they decide to “utilize” the lad in a different manner and count the minutes until they can find a nice millennial female with big boobs and blond hair to take his place, because nobody cares of she’s gay or not so long as she has big boobs and blonde hair, which is incredibly sexist, but that’s just marketing.

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